Sushi Sandwiches Sans Rice

Everybody loves sushi. Everybody. Even if you think you don't, you are either being a wussy or not eating the right sushi. But some of us aren't supposed to eat rice anymore because of the imposing threat of type 2 diabetes. Not super serious, but still a bummer.

Anyways, enough sob story. There are plenty of delicious foods to be made quickly, cheaply and most importantly, yummy.

I call these babies Sushi Sandwiches Sans Rice, as implied by the title. It is cucumbers, cream cheese and soy sauce. No rice. And there is no fish either because I don't have any, but otherwise that'd be pretty delicious too.

But that's it. Super simple. Really good. It'll make you look smart too. Trust me.

Canned Salad

Ya, I know how it sounds, but it has vinegar. Vinegar is the new chocolate syrup, every body has just got to have it.

This is a 3-Bean Salad with Herb Goat Cheese crumbles on top.

The picture is blurry because I literally couldn't wait another three seconds for my phone to focus.

I bought the bean salad at the grocery store in the canned bean isle. It is in a can called "Three Bean Salad" by Green Giant. It contains green beans, wax beans (not like the kind at the museum), dark red kidney beans, cider vinegar, bell peppers, normal vinegar and dried onions.

Goat cheese doesn't go well with everything (although it would appear otherwise looking through my blog), you can't go wrong with eggs, and apparently, you can't go wrong with beans either.

Serve chilled.

Chips and Dip Revised

Yummy Yumzone. If Mexico ever had a baby with Whole Foods, this is what would happen:

Check out this funky new twist on chips and dip! (I feel like I have to write cheesy as you'll notice there is no cheese on this plate.)

Plate Translation:

Broiled Bell Peppers= Chips

Texas Baked Beans or something= Refried beans

Avocado= Avocado

Plain Greek Yogurt= Sour cream

Put that "chip" in your mouth and chew it.

Micro Wave of the Future

So yes, "I" lost the cord to my Fat Camera so I'm relying on my Fancy Phone to supply my pictures.

In the mornings:

It is much faster to microwave breakfast.

It is much healthier to eat vegetables.

It is much easier to only use (hence: clean) one dish.

May I present to you, microwave eggs.

Microwave the mushrooms first, cause they take longer to cook. Add some spinach, microwave, beat and add eggs (pepper and a splash of milk optional). Microwave. Add goat cheese or cheddar if you love yourself.

Time estimates- everybody likes things cooked differently.

Mushrooms: 30

Spinach: 30

Eggs: 50

eggs: 30

hard chz: 10

soft chz: 0

Don't forget to stir occasionally.

Sad and Tragic Day. Did I mention Delicious?!

Okay. So life is funny, and also reads my blog. Probably how he stays so ironic. Anyways. A few months back... riiiiight around the time I stopped posting, I found out I am hyperglycemic, so basically simple sugars in my body (carbs and sugar, AKA: half of my diet) don't break down like they should, and just chill in my veins like a week long tubing fest making me abnormally tired. Constantly.

So I've been advised, by a medical doctor, to cut way back ("eliminate") simple sugars out of my diet or I could catch the diabetes.

SO this is my last (disclaimer: this sentence might not be true) post containing carbohydrates. I found these images in my "blog pics" folder and keyboard is soaked from drool already.

Croissant

Tomatoes

Fresh mozerella

Olive oil

Basil

(S&P to taste)

"Healthier" posts to follow. I have a lot of pics to share. I hope you all are hungry.

Hot Jesus Tabouli

Wow. Congratulations to myself for this creation.

Tabouli on lettuce

Pinto beans in red chili sauce

Cheese on top

It is kind of like a Frito pie, with the lettuce for a crunch. The citrus of the tabouli goes well with the spice of the bean sauce.

I'd definitely make this again on a day where I have a few spare hours (tabouli has to sit for an hour apparently), or on a day where like, the president comes over for dinner.

Sweet Tortilla wRap

Hot Mami,

Baby chickadee,

Got you rolled up on a plate just for me.

Any more sugar and you'd be-

an IV-

of liquid sucrose.

A trip.

A honey drip.

Dripin' all over the plate. Place.

Making a mess in the kitchen- on your chin and face.

It's bananas, things gettin' crazy,

Split and meant to share but you's kinda lazy.

Your stomachs kinda full. Blood sugar rising,

now try to sit and work all day advertising.

Soup or Liquid Salad?

So... an interesting fact about broccoli and cauliflower is that they almost completely dissolve in cream of potato soup. Add some milk or water to thin it out and poof- amazing. That is at least a week's worth of vegetables in one bowl. Okay, maybe a day's worth, but it is easy enough to do everyday, and tastes good enough to want more. The "X" shaped garnish on top (tomato slices) add nothing to this dish. I suggest leaving them off, but I wanted to brighten up the bowl of porridge looking mush, err, soup.

Another Cheap Pizza

Cheap frozen pizza + sliced tomatoes + real mozzarella+ super diced basil + drizzled olive oil = A stretchedpastitslimits stomach

A Simple Banana Split.

Oh ya... except the ice cream.

Health in yo face!

Choco Drank

Adult chocolate milk + whipped cream

It's Shake and Bake, and I helped myself to the whole thing.

Delish and oh so easy! If you aren't baking chicken, you aren't eating baked chicken. This particular day i decided to batter it which means to cake it in flour, roll it around in a raw egg then cover that with "Italian bread crumbs"- the kind you buy in the store. 350 degrees, 15 minutes flip over 15 more minutes. you can do a few min less if you wish. Obviously you can bake a few minutes longer, but I only recommend this if you like dry and possibly burned food.

Topped with Marinara sauce and Parm cheese. Incredible.

QuasiMexiPantry Sandwich

Wowwow wee wow. Hippie Burger.

A faded childhood memory mixed with pinch of dicing, a hint of slicing, and a dash of imagination.

This is a totally groovy-tastic burger. The beef patty is mixed with chopped walnuts and onions. Hell ya, right there in the beef. But, it is also stuffed with spinach and Australian Cheddar like the inside of a pot pie.

>( > ' )

Fish (beer batter-frozen). Lemon (mother nature). Pasta (olive oil, basil, parm).

classy. light. good.

Vegetarian Cotton Candy... Err Chocolate Salami

I've gotta admit, it tastes better when you are in Italy, it is still pretty good. It's gotta be the air quality or something; really, there is no other explanation. When I tell people this is vegetarian salami, it freaks people out, but it is. I mean, there is no meat in it, like vegetarian cotton candy. The CS is basically dark chocolate, tea biscuits, egg, sugar and a tiny bit of rum. When sliced, it resembles salami a bit more than it does in this picture.

Green Eggs and Can

Goat cheese and spinach are fantastic friends. They go everywhere together. They laugh together, cry together, and even get old together. One of their favorite things to do is getting hot and heavy with two scrambled eggs.

Spinach Spanish Burger

Did I do that?

Let truth be told, you don't need a recipe to bread and bake chicken.

First, I hit the chicken breast a few times with a meat tenderizer, mostly because it was available. Then, I mixed up some bread crumbs, flour, and egg, tossed the chicken in it and put it in a pan over olive oil. And because that wasn't perfect, I topped it with flour and bread crumbs again before putting it in the oven.

I'll be the first person to tell you, this was amazing. I'm very picky about chicken and hardly order it when I'm out because it tends to be dry, but I did something right. Something so right. I'm not trying to say I'm an amazing cook, but Einstein did say that coincidences are God's way of remaining anonymous. As you can see by the picture, I paired it with spaghetti. Blah blah blah.

MacCheeVeggFish

If you ever thought mac and cheese out of box was unhealthy, you have never been so wrong!

Can-You-Be-Lazier-Casserole?

There are two ways to do this: the easy way and the easy way.

The easy way:

Heat up some frozen chicken nuggets and mix with a bag of heated up cheesy rice broccoli. Then eat it.

The easy way:

Bread and bake chicken. Make rice. Steam broccoli. Mix all cooked ingredients together and add cheese. Mix and eat.